Huhwaitwhat? Vol III: Instant Messenger of Doom - February Archives

Since Mnem and I talk frequently on MSN, we are bringing Instant Messenger of Doom installments through montly archives. :B

<---INSERT DISTRACTING LINE BREAK HERE--->

Mnemosyne: May I ask what the little bunny creature monster thing pulling stars out of the frame has to do with any of this?

Mnemosyne: HOLD UP! We’re suing hit men? Think about it for a minute, Chronos. That’s like asking a ninja to pay his cell phone bills.

Mnemosyne: Crap, a shuriken.

Chronos: Yes. Fear the tinny weapon that will lead you to your doooooom.

Mnemosyne: Tinny or tiny?

Chronos: I meant to say tinny.

-after spamming some emoticons-

Mnemosyne: They’re so epic. This must be what it’s like to have a voodoo zombie black magic army.

Mnemosyne: Bored of your brain? Morbid about your mental state? Try ShakaLobo! The best in the field of quick and painless lobotomies. Get that irritating left hemisphere out of your life TODAY! Note: Doctors are not qualified physicians/brain surgeons, but are actually actors. Unemployed actors. Or at any rate, they will be.

Mnemosyne: -facepalm- Every time you write “ebil”, I think “gerbil”. I’m sorry.

-after Chronos has trapped Mnemosyne under an upside down laundry basket weighed down with rocks-

Chronos: -fixes- Happy?
Mnemosyne: As happy as I can be in a laundry basket under a pile of rocks with a leaking water dripper and wet clothes and an ancient loaf of bread that is moving slowly towards me as I speak.

-after Chronos gave Mnemosyne an animated bread roll named Lily-

Lily: 8D –walks over to computer and starts Facebooking-

Mnemosyne: Well, that’s creepy.

Lily: -adds Mnem- -jumps- FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED MEEEEEE! 8DDDDDDDD
Mnemosyne: -grabs security camera- -shakes- CHRONOS HELP ME WHAT THE HELL DO I FEED IT?!

Chronos: Oh, just give it a drop of your blood every day. –small dagger lands on the table-

Mnemosyne: -whimpers-

Lily: Hey, Mnemosyne. Dude, just gimme a French fry or something. Why are you holding a dagger? Hello? Hellooooooo?

Mnemosyne: -puts dagger down-

Chronos (over speakers): Oh yeah, I lied.

Mnemosyne: I KILL YOU.

Mnemosyne: Yes, life is unfair and sexist even in little kid cartoons.

Mnemosyne: -commences drinking song- Whaddya do wiv a drunken shailor? –hic-

Chronos: Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz. In other words… KILL THEM! –stab-

Mnemosyne: -nervous hiccup-

Chronos: Still croaking, eh? –stab stab stab stab-

Mnemosyne: -dying hiccups-

Chronos: Hm… -sticks in coffin-

Mnemosyne: -encoffinated hiccups-

Chronos: -calls Mnem’s parents- Uh, yeah, currently dying. Friend? Yeah. Uh huh. I’m sorry.

Mnemosyne: -“get me out of this wooden box” hiccup-

Chronos: What was that? Oh, nothing. I’m sorry, just her dying words… yes, she is very, very sick…

Mnemosyne: -“WTF are you talking to?” hiccup-

Chronos: You heard her? No, I’m sorry, you must be mistaken…

Mnemosyne: -“WTF are you doing this?” hiccup-

Chronos: Hm… yes… -bonks Mnem on head with hammer- Oh dear. A complication. … oh, nothing, sorry! I’ll call you back with more news. –hangs up-

Mnemosyne: -“ouch” hiccup-

Chronos: STOP LIVING DAMMIT. –bonk bonk bonk ponk ponk ponk-

Mnemosyne: I think I’m supposed to be working on the essay right now. : ( But it can wait. [fast forward to Tuesday morning] CRAP CRAP CRAP : P

Chronos: LOL. As expected of Mnemosyne.

Mnemosyne: -snort- At least it gets done.

Chronos: Psh if it was me… I WOULD BE SCREWED. D8 WHICH IS WHY IT IS CALLED HOME… work.

Mnemosyne: Chronos, it is you. You’re in the same pickle.

Chronos: … DAMMIT.

Mnemosyne: Big pickle, obviously, to fit both of us…

Chronos: -starts writing- THOUGH I HATE PICKLES. –starts writing again-

Mnemosyne: Whyyyyyyy do you haaaaaaaate piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiickles?

Chronos: They look like cucumbers. And they are suspended in fluid when not eaten. In other words… THEY ARE CYBORGS FROM THE FUTURE THAT PLAN TO TAKE OVER OUR BRAAAAAAINS!

Chronos: You are surrounded by two of my armies. Surrender.

Mnemosyne: Never. THIS IS SPARTA! –charges-

Chronos: No it ain’t. –armies NOM Mnem’s army-

Mnemosyne: What army?

Chronos: Thanks for that, I won’t have to worry about feeding them for… 10 years?

Mnemosyne: -confused- I think you will have a lot of explaining to do… that wasn’t my army you ate.

Chronos: Well, who cares, it was someone’s. And it will keep them full for 10 years. So screw whose army it was.

Mnemosyne: -quietly slips from room-

Chronos: -wakes up- AHA! –chases-

Mnemosyne: -flees-

Chronos: HEY, COME BACK -- -trips over rock- [insert epic slow mo] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOWAAAAAAAAAAGH -- -splat-

Mnemosyne: -returns with a lollipop-

Chronos: -stare…- YOU MADE ME CHASE AND TRIP FOR A LOLLIPOP WHY YOU LITTLE (#&$)(@#&$)(#@!*$_@!*$!@(&%()@#&$!*)@#(^%)(@#*$)(@!*$!@~!

Mnemosyne: -hurriedly presents lollipop to Chronos-

Chronos: I DON’T WANT CHER LOLLIPOP ROARZ. –returns to sulkily doing math hw-

Mnemosyne: -hurt- I never ASKED you to chase after me…

Chronos: Well, when you say –flees- and I add in some chase music in my head, it sure doesn’t help me to NOT chase after you, doesn’t it?!

-Chronos "I'm the only one that's laughing, right? :B"